The Energy Bar/Protein Bar Naughty List

This is part one of a two-part series analyzing the best and worst ingredients of the nutrition bar industry.

Santa's watching what ingredients you consume...

Santa's watching what ingredients you consume...

Well it’s that time of year againtime for Santa to make the two most important lists in the world; the naughty and nice lists. Now, we realize Santa is more of a cookie fan, but we thought we’d hand out our list of “naughty” and “nice” ingredients that you might find in some of the most popular energy/protein bars.

First up is the naughty list, broken down into 10 distinct categories. Are any of these found in your favorite bar?

  1. Added Sugars—AKA the root of all evil.

    • Glucose syrup

    • Brown rice syrup

    • Cane syrup

    • High fructose corn syrup

    • Invert sugar syrup

    • Maltodextrin

  2. Artificial Sweeteners- These abominable lab creations are conniving scoundrels that pose as real food, but are just zero calorie toxins.  

    • Sucralose (commonly known as Splenda, Equal, or NurtraSweet)

    • Aspartame

    • Saccharin (think Sweet n’ Low)

  3. Sugar Alcohols- These are sugars disguising themselves as harmless alcohols; unfortunately your body doesn’t know how to digest them. Don’t be fooled, these are gastro-intestinal home wreckers.

    • Erythritol

    • Sorbitol

    • Mannitol

    • Xylitol

  4. Fibers- Speaking of gastro-intestinal concerns, these harmful forms of an otherwise healthy nutrient (fiber) will wreak havoc on your GI track.  

  5. Soy- Hello man boobs! Derived from beans, soy can interfere with thyroid functioning and sex hormones just to name a few.

  6. Lecithin- Sure it holds things together, but it will tear apart your intestines, which can result in spending the holidays in the bathroom instead of the living room.

    • Soy Lecithin

    • Sunflower Lecithin

  7. Bad Oils- These insidious things will literally hunt for the good fat molecules in your body and turn them into bad fat molecules while also causing a rise in bad cholesterol and speeding up the aging process.

    • Vegetable Oil

    • Canola Oil

    • Soybean Oil

    • Sunflower Oil

    • Safflower Oil

    • Anything hydrogenated or partially hydrogenated

    • Peanut Oil

    • Margarine

  8. Preservatives- No they won’t preserve your health, they will instead throw your body into chaos. These Scrooges bring with them some of the strangest side effects, such as enlarged liver, paralysis, and convulsions.

    • TBHQ

    • BHT

    • BHA

    • EDTA

    • Sulfites

    • Benzoates

    • Nitrates

    • Ascorbic Acid

    • Citric Acid

  9. Dyes- Colorful? Yes. Healthy? Far from it. These vibrant villains could lead to cancer, hyperactivity, or even chromosome damage. Taste the rainbow, get sick.

    • Blue #1

    • Blue #2

    • Citrus Red #2

    • Yellow #5

    • Green #3

    • Orange #1

    • Orange B

  10. Natural Flavors- These liars are only derived from a "natural" entity, and that can mean basically anything. Some natural flavors have been found to ACTUALLY emanate from anal gland secretions of beavers…seriously, this is not a joke, watch this segment from 60 Minutes.

    • Natural Flavors

Santa and your body will know if you’ve been bad or good, so eat some Choice for goodness sake.

And come back tomorrow to see the Nice List!